Official Motto: “It’s not that simple.”
Core Belief: Truth exists… but only with mitigating conditions, temporal modifiers, and room for plausible deniability.
🎭 Known Members
🔹 Probably Phil
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Wears beige.
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Once tried to take a position but broke out in hives.
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Favourite saying: “I mean, it seems that way, doesn’t it?”
🔹 Possibly Pauline
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Invented the shrug.
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Leaves all doors slightly ajar.
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Lives in a house with only frosted windows.
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Favourite saying: “Well, I wouldn’t rule it out.”
🔹 Surely Susan
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The evangelical of uncertainty.
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Uses confidence as a decoy.
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Favourite saying: “Surely, we can agree… can’t we?”
🔹 Actually Alan (Expelled)
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Obsessed with correcting everyone.
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Too certain. Too loud. Used italics in casual speech.
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Now lives alone with a thesaurus and regret.
🕰 Initiation Ritual
To join the Modal Adjuncts, you must:
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Begin a sentence three times, abandoning each attempt halfway.
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Hedge a direct answer into a polite evasion.
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Casually undermine your own argument with a parenthetical aside.
e.g.,
“Look, I don’t not agree with that, but at the same time, it’s — well, it’s probably more nuanced than that, isn’t it?”
📚 Foundational Texts
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Modality and Mood: Maybe Means Maybe
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A Guide to Saying Something Without Actually Saying It
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The Definite Guide to Indefinite Claims
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Yes, No, and Everything In Between by Prof. Ambig U. Ous
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